AnonymousLawStudent

The half-truths, omissions, and outright lies about floating through law school.

Tuesday 02/08/2005

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

The only people who still voluntarily talk in class after 1L year are the complete freaks and the transfers. The transfers have something to prove. They aren't very entertaining but earnest and very hard working. Way to do the reading on time, Timmy! Just like they taught you at Tuskaloosa College of Law and Pottery, or wherever it is you crawled here from.

The freaks can be roughly classified into two catogeries, roughly correlating with gender:

Conservative Boy: This guy beats off to Ayn Rand. And not the weird sex scenes. Everything he says gets reduced to some kind of market analysis. Usually, it bespeaks a horrible understanding of how markets work and are structured. If you told him that the U.S. should go back to the gold standard, he would be your friend. If he believed in that "friend" thing. The surprising thing about him is: If he is such a strident believer in the efficiency of markets, how can he continually expose others to the negative externality of his blathering?

Liberal Girl: She is kind of attractive in an odd way but mostly just annoying. She has no conception that things cost money or that raising taxes indefinitely is not something the world has agreed on. If you want to make her cry give her a graph and an integral equation to solve. Or just remind her of the plight of the Bolivian dirt farmer in this harsh globalizing world of ours. Despite her concern for the common good there is no doubt that she will marry a financier of some sort and drive an SUV to school board meetings somewhere in, near, or around Wilton, CT.

15 Comments:

At 10:06 PM, Blogger Peatey said...

You seem to have a future in taxonomy. Do profs now. The famed Yale prof 'slumming' away his old age at a lower tier, the divorced and bitter family law prof, the derivatives prof who wishes he had gone into banking, the judge, etc...

 
At 10:49 PM, Blogger ALS said...

"You seem to have a future in taxonomy. Do profs now."

Hey man, I don't do request. But we will get to the fifth estate soon enough.

 
At 11:07 PM, Blogger Law Slave said...

I am a 2L and I can honestly say I talk more in class now, but for another reason than the reasons you gave. Quite honestly, I am sick of hearing people talk that don't say anything - i.e. liberal girls that don't know things cost money. After sitting through an entire year and a half of people making no sense or speaking for 10 minutes saying nothing at all, I have decided it is time to speed up the class - give the correct answer the prof. right away so that I no longer have to listen to these annoying people (who tend to speak slower than the average person for some reason I guess I will never understand) say the most ridiculous abstract things - like "what do you think the court was feeling when..." Honestly, who the hell cares what the court was feeling - does it really matter? Will it be on the test? NO!! And how would my professor know anyway? Did the justices keep diaries??? That is the reason I now raise my hand in class. I have been driven to participation by annoying people. There is only one thing worse than someone who constantly speaks up in class - the person who thinks they know everything, never says anything, but rolls their eyes at everything everyone else says.

 
At 11:23 PM, Blogger ALS said...

"There is only one thing worse than someone who constantly speaks up in class - the person who thinks they know everything, never says anything, but rolls their eyes at everything everyone else says."

You see, I disagree. The people who sit there may roll their eyes and be smug about it but at least they aren't outwardly bothering anyone. The people who go on for more than 5 mins. at a time, for whatever reason just need to be shot.

But you know what else makes the class goes fast? Wireless internet. There's so much porn out there to look at.

 
At 11:44 PM, Blogger Law Slave said...

ok, i will admit i roll my eyes - but who doesn't?? But, I am talking about the people that make it obvious and actually sigh out loud- that's just rude. I do have wireless internet, but you won't catch me looking at porn. I think the guys behind me / beside me (who are probably already staring at me - haha) may get a little excited if they see me looking at porn. Hmmm...what law school are you at??? If you have time to look at porn, maybe you should think about transferring to a harder school - or are you just that smart???

 
At 12:09 AM, Blogger Peatey said...

today's law students are so lame, when a lawyer at the FTC told me he and his law school buddies used to play networked Doom (using ethernet cables!) during class, I almost worshipped him, right there. Then he asked me to help him do document review.

 
At 12:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I think the guys behind me / beside me (who are probably already staring at me - haha) may get a little excited if they see me looking at porn."

Good point. Better just post your boob pics on your blog.

 
At 1:25 PM, Blogger Legally Blog said...

Anon, you are so right. There are annoying people that just like to hear their own voice, without any consideration about us, the people who are listening to them. Your right, I check out when those people begin to blabber on and on, because wireless is God's gift to law students.

 
At 5:25 PM, Blogger ALS said...

"may get a little excited if they see me looking at porn. Hmmm...what law school are you at??? If you have time to look at porn, maybe you should think about transferring to a harder school - or are you just that smart???"

Why would I leave for a "harder" school? Harder by no means equals better. In fact I would argue that with a few exceptions along the way, there is an inverse relationship.

And I won't reveal my exact location but let's just say that it's a NYC Law School that resides in the top 5 of the rankings.

 
At 9:23 PM, Blogger Law Slave said...

don't get angry - i was just joking. But, now you aren't so anonymous anymore.

 
At 10:35 PM, Blogger ALS said...

"don't get angry - i was just joking. But, now you aren't so anonymous anymore."

Oh, I am not angry, my dear Julie. And I think the loss in some anonymity is worth establishing that I don't attend New York Law School.

 
At 2:30 AM, Blogger Peatey said...

we know you're NYU, because Columbia woulda said "top 4."

:)

 
At 6:14 PM, Blogger ALS said...

"we know you're NYU, because Columbia woulda said "top 4."

:)"

Or I could be Tom Wolfe, doing research on my next novel, "2L in Full."

 
At 12:24 AM, Blogger Peatey said...

If you were Tom Wolfe, your picture wouldn't show you wearing a blue suit...

 
At 2:29 PM, Blogger ALS said...

"If you were Tom Wolfe, your picture wouldn't show you wearing a blue suit..."

Thats why I am incognito.

 

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